Hey dianab1030,
I am so sorry for your current troubles, but wish you to be aware that you are not alone. My first suggestion to you is to be prepared for the worst! I am not saying it is going to happen and there is nothing you can do, but being ill prepared is not an option for you. This means that you need to get a support foundation under you... Family and close friends. Sit each one down and start by telling them you do not want them to judge your husband, but are making them aware of the situation so that you may seek help if he does leave. Every time they try to talk down to you about your husband, adamently tell them that you are seeking reconciliation with him, and they are not helping by attacking him. Next, contact a family counselor or priest (someone of your religious affiliation) and seek counseling for techniques to try and bring your relationship closer... See if your husband will join you... I am betting not, but you can tell him to stop asking you to PROVE your love for him when you are the only one seeming to fight for your relationship. Finally, talk to an attorney. Tell him you are not seeking a divorce, but want to know where you stand if your husband attempts to file one... Be practical and ask about living arrangements and finances.
Now, looking at what I see from your description of your husband... On first look, I would say he is going through a severe mid-life crisis which has thrown him into a pretty deep depression. The alcohol isn't helping, because it is a depressant in itself, so depressing plus alcohol equals a faster decline into the dark realms of the mind. He needs help, and not just because of his desire to run away from you. It sounds as if he is trying to run away from everyone and everything in his life. I can tell from experience this does not work and comes to bite you later. He will go even further into depression once he realizes what all he has wasted.
My suggestion to you: First of all, stop trying to prove your love for him. He is attention seeking and you are rewarding this behavior. You want to prove your love for him in a meaningful way? Get him help! He won't want it, and will fight you and curse you for it... Most do when their faults and damaging behaviors are brought to light. Now, I am not telling you to stand up and tell him you are done telling him you love... I am not telling you to stop giving him attention at all... I am telling you to stop feeding his self pity. Gather His friends and His family... People that have shown him they loved him in the past... Talk with a counselor, and I would discuss the possibility of needing an intervention. If not to stop his drinking... I do not know from your description if I would classify him as an alcoholic or not, but at the very least he needs to be seeing a psychiatrist and possibly put on anti-depressants. For help on this front, you can go to Google or ask.com and type in help with depression for all kinds of support groups. Get his family and friends to help you to convince him to get the help he so richly needs and deserves.
I hope I have helped and have given you hope!
I am so sorry for your current troubles, but wish you to be aware that you are not alone. My first suggestion to you is to be prepared for the worst! I am not saying it is going to happen and there is nothing you can do, but being ill prepared is not an option for you. This means that you need to get a support foundation under you... Family and close friends. Sit each one down and start by telling them you do not want them to judge your husband, but are making them aware of the situation so that you may seek help if he does leave. Every time they try to talk down to you about your husband, adamently tell them that you are seeking reconciliation with him, and they are not helping by attacking him. Next, contact a family counselor or priest (someone of your religious affiliation) and seek counseling for techniques to try and bring your relationship closer... See if your husband will join you... I am betting not, but you can tell him to stop asking you to PROVE your love for him when you are the only one seeming to fight for your relationship. Finally, talk to an attorney. Tell him you are not seeking a divorce, but want to know where you stand if your husband attempts to file one... Be practical and ask about living arrangements and finances.
Now, looking at what I see from your description of your husband... On first look, I would say he is going through a severe mid-life crisis which has thrown him into a pretty deep depression. The alcohol isn't helping, because it is a depressant in itself, so depressing plus alcohol equals a faster decline into the dark realms of the mind. He needs help, and not just because of his desire to run away from you. It sounds as if he is trying to run away from everyone and everything in his life. I can tell from experience this does not work and comes to bite you later. He will go even further into depression once he realizes what all he has wasted.
My suggestion to you: First of all, stop trying to prove your love for him. He is attention seeking and you are rewarding this behavior. You want to prove your love for him in a meaningful way? Get him help! He won't want it, and will fight you and curse you for it... Most do when their faults and damaging behaviors are brought to light. Now, I am not telling you to stand up and tell him you are done telling him you love... I am not telling you to stop giving him attention at all... I am telling you to stop feeding his self pity. Gather His friends and His family... People that have shown him they loved him in the past... Talk with a counselor, and I would discuss the possibility of needing an intervention. If not to stop his drinking... I do not know from your description if I would classify him as an alcoholic or not, but at the very least he needs to be seeing a psychiatrist and possibly put on anti-depressants. For help on this front, you can go to Google or ask.com and type in help with depression for all kinds of support groups. Get his family and friends to help you to convince him to get the help he so richly needs and deserves.
I hope I have helped and have given you hope!