Hi Superman71!
I'm sorry to hear your dilemma.
As a woman in the workforce I have left a few jobs over the years due to harassment and health issues, each time with my husband by my side (OK, so twice he really thought I was nuts, but I was much better off for having left and was able to eat and sleep again!).
My situation was not as stellar as yours because mine was the secondary (disposable) income, not the primary and basically contributed to the "extras" involved in running a house and raising a child. I felt that had I stayed I would lose my mind! I would come home at night drained of energy, not wanting to do the simple things like cook, eat or sleep. Have you heard the saying "When momma ain't happy…" well it applies to papa too!
My questions are:
1. Is there a position in your current state that is comparable to the position you found in the new state?
2. Is there a possibility that you can afford to take a small pay cut, perhaps downsizing your job and/or responsibilities in a different field?
3. If you are willing to take this pay cut, would you be willing to go back to school to pursue either a field you are interested in or to further your current field?
Talk to your wife. I think it would be unfair to uproot the children at this point, especially since school is already in session and they have their ways and friends.
I think it would be a good thing to lay everything out for yourself first and then bring it to your wife. Once you are at peace with this situation I suggest that you send the children to a friend's house for a sleep over and spend the entire night talking about this. Your darling wife may be much more receptive to your (collective) plight and have better ideas than you are giving her credit for. You must give her the credit she deserves. After all, she does love you.
The brain is a terrible thing, Superman71; please keep this in mind. It will play tricks on you and make you "see" things that really aren't there. It will encourage you to have terrible thoughts if you let it. You must learn to separate from your brain for just a little while to see the facts as they are. Remember, NOTHING is black, NOTHING is white. IT IS ONLY GRAY.
Please let us know how it goes.
I'm sorry to hear your dilemma.
As a woman in the workforce I have left a few jobs over the years due to harassment and health issues, each time with my husband by my side (OK, so twice he really thought I was nuts, but I was much better off for having left and was able to eat and sleep again!).
My situation was not as stellar as yours because mine was the secondary (disposable) income, not the primary and basically contributed to the "extras" involved in running a house and raising a child. I felt that had I stayed I would lose my mind! I would come home at night drained of energy, not wanting to do the simple things like cook, eat or sleep. Have you heard the saying "When momma ain't happy…" well it applies to papa too!
My questions are:
1. Is there a position in your current state that is comparable to the position you found in the new state?
2. Is there a possibility that you can afford to take a small pay cut, perhaps downsizing your job and/or responsibilities in a different field?
3. If you are willing to take this pay cut, would you be willing to go back to school to pursue either a field you are interested in or to further your current field?
Talk to your wife. I think it would be unfair to uproot the children at this point, especially since school is already in session and they have their ways and friends.
I think it would be a good thing to lay everything out for yourself first and then bring it to your wife. Once you are at peace with this situation I suggest that you send the children to a friend's house for a sleep over and spend the entire night talking about this. Your darling wife may be much more receptive to your (collective) plight and have better ideas than you are giving her credit for. You must give her the credit she deserves. After all, she does love you.
The brain is a terrible thing, Superman71; please keep this in mind. It will play tricks on you and make you "see" things that really aren't there. It will encourage you to have terrible thoughts if you let it. You must learn to separate from your brain for just a little while to see the facts as they are. Remember, NOTHING is black, NOTHING is white. IT IS ONLY GRAY.
Please let us know how it goes.