If your mother and father are separated ... And do NOT have a custody agreement ... Then it is up to the parent you live with.
At least, unless your mother files a court order ... Which would result in all parties having to work out a custody agreement.
At 16, you have a huge say in who you live with, however, you'd have to prove you'd be better off in the conditions you want to live (a difficult thing sometimes to prove). This is a difficult era in life, 16, perhaps in another 2 years of suffering, you'll be 18 and do whatever you want.
In the US you need a court agreement as to where you live. If your mother has custody now, then you will have to stay with her. Your grandparents and your father can petition to court to change the custody. They would need to show a valid reason for the change. Something like your mother having trouble caring for you. If you have food and shelter and you are not being abused, chances are that won't change without her permission.
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